Attention Huggie Designers

Saturday morning when I went in Emersen's room to say good morning I was greeted with a serious stench. I proceeded to change her diaper and realized this was a heavy duty, spill out of the diaper, soft, mushy, stinky mess. Her sleeper pj's, regular pj's and onsie (it gets cold in our house) were all stained a mustard yellow. I cleaned her up and changed her into a very cute pink outfit and even brushed her hair and finished it off with a pink bow. I was actually glad to have her already to go so we could do something fun together while Rod took Rhett to "He and Me Day" at pre-school. My only concern was keeping her clean through breakfast. Famous last thought.

She stayed clean through breakfast but had another similar explosion soon after that. I started thinking maybe she had a little stomach bug because her dirty diapers usually stay contained within her diaper and don't occur twice in one hour. After changing her diaper and outfit a second time she was ready for a nap at 9:30 am. This girl never falls asleep before 11am. Needless to say we stayed home so she could take a long nap and upon waking she reguritated her breakfast all over my sweatshirt. Yes it was confirmed she definitely had something. Later that evening I knew she was exhausted and going to crash early and Rhett was healthy so we went over to a friends house to watch a movie. Upon leaving their house Rhett threw up his brownie and pie all over their dining room floor. My main thoughts were not of compassion for my sick children but more dissapointment that I was going to miss the Bono interview at church the next day.

With the exception of many trips to the bathroom, Emmie screaming everytime I applied Desitin to her diaper rash and the Bears losing the Superbowl Sunday was a pretty easy day. Although I hate to see Rhett sick he is much easier to take care of this way. The only thing he wanted to do on Sunday was nap, read books and drink water. No messes (except for Emmie's diaper) to clean or food to cook. Lot's of snuggling and reading and learning the ins and outs of excessive evacuation of watery feces.

Monday morning Rhett woke up at 5:45 am starving for a piece of toast. He went back to sleep and Emersen woke up grumpy an hour later. At least her room smelled good. After consoling her for an hour or so I got her back to sleep and was about to lay back down myself when I heard Rhett rambling on and on in my bed to Rod. Apparently he was feeling better and felt the need to talk about anything and everything. This was the conversation on the first trip to the toilet of the day.

R: "mom I'm feeling better"
me: "I'm so glad, I don't like it when you're sick"
(meanwhile the evacuation process was well underway)
R: "diarrhea on the toilet is not fun, poop and pee on the toilet is fun but not diarrhea"
me: "uh huh"
R: laughing he says: "yesterday I had diarrhea on the floor and in a bowl (he actually confused the second part with vomit) and the toilet"
me: "let's try and keep it in the toilet today"
R: "I'm feeling better but Nana can still buy me an animal"
of coarse as soon as my mom heard they were sick she was on the phone with Rhett taking requests as to what would make him feel better

That was the only conversation around the toilet we had today but it was the first of many, many trips to the toilet. Basically my day today has been spent rushing Rhett to the toilet, changing Emmie's diaper thus all layers of clothing, bathing both children, feeding them, washing all the mustard clothes, drying all the mustard clothes, and doing it over and over again. At one point I was starting to change Emmie's diaper and after seeing the horror of it I yelled for Rod to help me and meet me in the bathtub because some things are way too horrific to try and clean on carpet. Rhett comes running in the bathroom saying "I want to watch, this is going to be a good show?" And yes indeed it was.

So day three of our toxic elimination is over and I'm hoping the vastness of it all goes down a least a smudge tomorrow. Tonight I'm going to bed thinking about a new invention for Huggies. Someone needs to make a diaper that rides way above the belly button and maybe even down the thighs like those bathing suits people wore in the 1930's. Sure people would only buy them when their babies were sick but maybe it could have that material that doesn't puff up in water and double as a bathing suit.

If anyone know's someone from the diaper busniess let me know, I'm off to enjoy some food and more importantly some fresh air.